Digital Smarts - Talking to Other Parents About Your Media Rules

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When it comes to digital safety, a lot comes down to modeling the kind of behavior you would like to see your kids follow as well as setting rules and expectations for everyone in your household, including visitors. One way to do that it is to let other parents know when they drop off their kids at your house what kind of rules you follow when it comes to television, movies, games and apps. Here is how to do that:

  • Clearly state your media dos and don’ts. Be as specific as possible about the time limits, types of media, and content you allow and don't allow.
  • Share the titles. If your kid is currently into a certain show or game, it's likely they'll want to enjoy it with their friend. Tell the other parent that you're comfortable with, for example, the kids watching two episodes of The Mandalorian after they get back from riding bikes.
  • Check out their response to your rules. Remember, the other parent may not like your media rules. And if you want them to respect yours, you need to return the favor.
  • Make sure your kids know the rules. Discuss any media rules with your kid in advance and make sure they know that playdates depend on them being responsible about sticking to the rules.
  • Be consistent. The more you set the ground rules at your home around media and tech, the more other parents will start to expect it from you. And if you're lucky, they'll start following your lead.

And remember…. If your kid ends up seeing something at someone else's house that you wouldn't have approved of, it's not likely to do much damage. Restate your rules with your kid, but don't put too much pressure on them to uphold them when you are not around. They're still learning how to do that. And if you freak out because their friend showed them an off-limits video, they might not tell you about it next time. If it was egregious (porn, explicit R-rated movie, etc.), you might consider having an open, nonjudgmental conversation with the other parent and next time, invite the other kid to your place!